Afraid that my penmanship would be recognized, I never tried writing on those. So all my thoughts are inside my head. And they are sinking one by one, leaving me alone in the dark.
So when I found out about Love of the Day, I am thankful that I can post some desperate love poems and messages of mine.
Much to my delight was my discovery of Your Confessions where I can send my secrets in life, most of which focus on my huge admiration to this guy. It may sound desperate, but hey, this is my life so I can do whatever I want. Anyway, going back to the topic, I send messages which I can not tell to this guy in person. I send them to keep myself sane, to keep myself free this hopeless romance that is very inevitable. I send them reminding me that someday I will be able to tell him those words. But as of now, I know I can't because I am really afraid of what he will think of me, afraid that this admiration will not be appreciated. See, I am afraid of rejection. But what can I do? Nada.
I send not only love messages but also some issues (I would not discuss it, too private) that I find mind-boggling.
Aside from Your Confession, I also found out about Letters to Crushes to which I am thankful for. I imagine that I am really writing to him a letter. I know they're just letters that will be published in the internet but will never be in his hands. Too bad that I can't give him those letters. Too bad that he can not read them personally.
Thank God there are 'online freedom walls' which help me to shout out what I think, what I feel. Though he will never get a chance to read, I have to live with it. At least, I was able to pull them off my chest, my mind. I'm just glad that these sites are created. :)
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